Behavioral Counseling for children
Wouldn’t it be nice if children knew all the things that adults have learned and then behaved appropriately? But as we know, children are not adults in cute, small bodies. While they are often innocent and charming, they can also be selfish and head-strong. Often they mirror the behaviors they have experienced or witnessed. On occasion they develop behaviors from watching other children or things they have heard or seen — whether at home, on the TV or at school. On rare cases they develop behaviors on their own. As guardians of children, we often do not know why they are acting the way they do. So, we are not sure about how to best correct the problem. They did not come with a manual on how to deal with their moods, behaviors, or responses.
Usually children attempt to be their parents’ “best” child. However, not always knowing what their parents want, they become discouraged when they do not get the hoped for approval. The child ends up getting frustrated or hurt. This results in angry and resentful behaviors. Even more serious than the child who is getting in trouble, it is the child who has given up and just stops trying—what we describe as depression. Unlike an adult’s depression, a child’s depression is often marked by hyperactivity rather than sitting on the couch. In all these instances we need to correctly identify what are the underlying issues. If we just attempt to stop the bad behaviors, they will often be replaced with others.
It is important then to understand what is happening. Often the child does not know nor can they put their feelings into words. That is when it is really important for the parent to be able to be more compassionate, more supportive, so the child can express themselves.
If you find yourself having difficulty connecting with your child, don’t you want to get help? You have put in a lot of concern, care, and effort in raising them. Reaching out to a counselor and getting answers and a way to improve the situation is worth it for the life-long happiness you wanted with your child.
Having worked with hundreds of children from 1 to 21 over the forty years that I have been practicing, I know what to expect and often what might work with your child. You always remain the primary person in your child’s life, but sometimes it helps to have some help with them. Give us a call.